~ honest. sincere. embarrassing. funny. with a healthy dose of sarcasm. ~

Tuesday, May 24

The Weighted Issues

It took me just over a year to lose almost 60 pounds. I started working out at the Y and the weight seemed to fall off faster than I could realize. I went from over 180 lbs to under 130 and it felt awesome. I stayed at that goal weight for about a year and then I got lazy. I haven't gained a lot of weight back - so the scale says - but because I'm short the pounds show easily. I need to get back into that routine. 2 years ago I didn't miss a day - there was nothing that got in my way. Now, I'll take any excuse to stay home.

Working at the Y doesn't help now - I feel like I live there some days and when I come back to work out I want to just get in and get my work out done and go home. But I see too many people and they start talking and my 1 hour workout turns into 2 hours and I feel like I've done nothing. So I've majorly slacked in the last year. I also see people that have been coming for years 4-5 days a week and haven't missed a beat. That can be depressing when I see my track record lately. One mom I know was on the treadmill the day she went into labour - then she was back into her running schedule 4 weeks after giving birth. Her 'baby' is now 3 and I could plan my week around her being there. One lady said today with a huge sigh after she told me how badly she didn't want to work out - "I wish there was a pill for this - like 'pick a size and stay that size and eat whatever you want'." How nice would that be.

I actually really love working out - once I get to the gym. I was never really active in school sports or anything - but I've learned that I really enjoy running. It feels like the best drug afterwards - my body is relaxed and my head is clear and I actually have so much more energy. But it's getting off my butt to go that I have a hard time with. I get home from work and have lunch and I have about 2 hours before I have to pick Tim up. But lately I'll choose laundry and dishes before the gym -- yeah, that's how bad it is!

I get lots of advice at work - I'm surrounded by workout crazed individuals! One person told me to take pictures of myself in a bikini and pin it up on my fridge and in visual places around the house. Yeah, thanks but just my luck and I'll forget about them when I have company over. I've heard to set my alarm 30 minutes early and go for a run -- (obviously this person has not seen me before a coffee.) I've heard lots of great ideas - and used a lot of them. I know they work - I'm just in a major slump and I hate being in this slump.

I know I can do it again - I was a lot worse off than I am now and I did better than I thought I would. It's a matter of making it a priority again and tuning into that mindset I had 4 years ago. And I might as well take advantage of being young and being able to shed the pounds quickly, cause in a few years it's not going to be as easy to yo-yo...I'll be more on a constant incline!

So enough of the sob story and excuses right? I've given myself enough pep talks - and sharing the struggles here feels a little embarrassing but I know so many people feel this way...and maybe it will make me more aware.

So, I'm back to the treadmill...

xo J


kelly said...

hi jessica, i've read your blog occasionally through amanda (we used to work together), and your entry struck a chord! i'm sort of in the same place. i tried on some pants i wore a year and a half ago, and they don't fit! so there's the cycle of wanting SO badly to lose that weight, but finding it so hard to be motivated to get into the exercise....
anyway, myself and many others (i'm sure), know just what you mean - and i guess we just have to take it one day at a time!

Jessi said...

thanks for commenting, kelly! i agree - one day at a time.
i've read your blog also through amanda's.

the salmon said...

i want to encourage you too jess! every day is a new day to make the right choice. so just take that knowledge and go. don't stress out about the days that you didnt get around to it. just start over, every day. some house work is exercise too (like vacuuming or sweeping) so don't forget to count those days.
one thing i tell myself is that 10 minutes of exercise each day helps, it doesnt have to be an hour.

ps. i feel so honored to have brought the two of you together ;) hee hee

Jessi said...

thanks amanda,
i know - i'm learning to not stress about how much i haven't done. it's just frustrating when you look at pictures and see where you could be if you'd stuck with it - you know? i'm getting there!
-- and about the housework; according to my calcuations...i should have the body of a supermodel by now!! it never ends!! :)