We went to London today to visit with Baby Julia and her family in the Hospital before they head to Toronto this week. Julia will be receiving her Bone Marrow Transplant on March 10th...and we wanted to get a good visit in before they went.
I am amazed at the strength that Charlene shows, and it's a real strength. She is optomistic and hopeful - but not naive. They explained what the doctors have told them -- the risks and concerns. Julia is a very unique case -- she is the youngest baby in Canada to be diagnosed with this form of cancer, and it's very strong. The Doctors have sought out help from Europe and U.S. for some insight into treating her. After her transplant there is a 50% chance that she could get Leukemia again, and they would not treat her a second time - her tiny body couldn't handle it. So they want to do this right.
I watched Charlene today - how she looked at Julia, how she watched her angel play, how she laughed at her silly faces and tiny giggles. I looked around at the cramped room that they had shared for months - just the 2 of them. I thought of the days that they would spend alone in the room, playing, singing, laughing. I thought of Charlene knowing her baby was in pain and not being able to do anything but hold her, wipe her tears and pray that tomorrow would be better. I thought of Julia growing up in a room the size of a bathroom for the majority of the past 8 months. The only sure things in her life were pain, and her Mommy. It took every ounce of strength in my body to not cry.
But then I had to think about what I wasn't seeing;
I wasn't seeing Charlene suffering - I was seeing her enjoying Julia. I wasn't seeing her worrying about what they didn't know - I was seeing her comforted by what they did know. They are headed to Toronto unsure of where they will be staying, unsure of what the next few days or weeks would bring. But very sure that this is the only chance that they have for their little angel to survive. When Julia is in isolation for the months following her transplant - Charlene will have limited visitors, if any. But she wasn't worried about being lonely - her only concern was that her baby would be better. I wasn't seeing a Mother saying "Poor me..." I was seeing a mother saying "She needs me!"
I know we never see our true strength until the hard times come. I have been through a lot in life - but nothing to this degree. I could only hope that I would show even a touch of the strength and courage that I see in Charlene...if I ever had to face such adversity.
And tonight I will give Tim a few extra kisses and hold Garnet a little closer...and be thankful for what I have. Because it's so easy to take for granted things that truly make our lives complete. It's so easy to look past what's right in front of us while we are looking for something more. Until we see how fast it can be taken away...
xo J
Sunday, February 27
Saturday, February 26
A New Baby!
Congrats to Amanda and Derek Salmon -- they have a new little girl named Diedre (dee-Ay-dra) June Emma Salmon. I am so happy for you both! Can't wait to see pictures!!!
I grew up with Amanda in good old Bonfield (well...Rutherglen;) - and now she lives out in BC. Maybe I'll get out there again one day soon and meet Diedre!
I grew up with Amanda in good old Bonfield (well...Rutherglen;) - and now she lives out in BC. Maybe I'll get out there again one day soon and meet Diedre!
Friday, February 25
Young love...
So I've started to notice a trend in my blog....I like writing about love. But hey, I'm a romantic at heart and can't help it. So one more cute one for y'all....
Tim has a little girl in his class that has Celiac Disease. We have all learned a great deal about it, I have become friends with the Mom and the whole class is involved with knowing that she has certain things that she can't eat. Recently, she was also just diagnosed with Juvenile Diabetes - which is, unfortunately, very normal in Celiac sufferers. So, we are all in the process of learning about this. She is the cutest little girl ever with these huge brown eyes bouncy curls and always a smile! While she was away in the hospital Tim was very worried about her and so we bought a card and Tim wrote a little note on it for her.
She is back in the class now and Tim just told me today that they are 'in love'; "She loves me so much Mom, she doesn't want to sit with (her best friend) anymore -- she always wants to sit with me. And I love her too!"......awwww, how sweet.
(Yeah, I know...talk to me in about 10 years and we'll see how cute I think his romancing is then!!...uh oh!;)
xo J
Tim has a little girl in his class that has Celiac Disease. We have all learned a great deal about it, I have become friends with the Mom and the whole class is involved with knowing that she has certain things that she can't eat. Recently, she was also just diagnosed with Juvenile Diabetes - which is, unfortunately, very normal in Celiac sufferers. So, we are all in the process of learning about this. She is the cutest little girl ever with these huge brown eyes bouncy curls and always a smile! While she was away in the hospital Tim was very worried about her and so we bought a card and Tim wrote a little note on it for her.
She is back in the class now and Tim just told me today that they are 'in love'; "She loves me so much Mom, she doesn't want to sit with (her best friend) anymore -- she always wants to sit with me. And I love her too!"......awwww, how sweet.
(Yeah, I know...talk to me in about 10 years and we'll see how cute I think his romancing is then!!...uh oh!;)
xo J
Tuesday, February 22
Baby Julia Update
Mike and Charlene had their consultation with the Doctors from Toronto that will be doing her transplant next week. Wow I am speechless.
Please read;
http://www2.caringbridge.org/canada/julia/
Please read;
http://www2.caringbridge.org/canada/julia/
Canada does some things right...
I've been against drugging kids for ADHD for a long time (since I worked in a classroom of 32 kids and 15 of them were being drugged for "ADHD") I DO believe that ADHD exists (if you've met my husband you know I have to believe it) but I think labelling kids as hyperactive or having attention deficit is detrimental to their spirit. I think kids are labeled too easily and drugged way too often. If a child is acting out - there is always a reason. These reasons need to be explored, the home, the parents and the child's life....not just throw a pill at them and tell them they have a problem. Hopefully this is the beginning of searching for other ways to help troubled children!
Read the article;http://parentcenter.babycenter.com/news/?id=523942#story
Read the article;http://parentcenter.babycenter.com/news/?id=523942#story
Monday, February 21
Dating my husband
Garnet and I decided that we would go on a date once a month starting this year. We saw that there were so many other things taking priority over our relationship and decided to make US a priority. So we had our second official date of the year this weekend. It was very nice. Our friend Steve was turning 30 so there was a surprise birthday party for him - Garnet and I went out for dinner first and then had a great time at the party.
It's nice for us to get out and look pretty once in a while and Tim loves having a babysitter. It makes to be a very expensive night when it's all done -- but that's why we're only making it once a month. It just means Tim may not have a college fund -- but hey, it's worth it cause we're dating again!! ;)
It's nice for us to get out and look pretty once in a while and Tim loves having a babysitter. It makes to be a very expensive night when it's all done -- but that's why we're only making it once a month. It just means Tim may not have a college fund -- but hey, it's worth it cause we're dating again!! ;)
Saturday, February 19
Old Love
We watched The Notebook last night...it was so cute! Even Garnet said it was the best chick flick he'd ever seen :) Of course, I was a blubbering fool and crying through most of it...I can't help it, I'm a romantic. I love older people in love! I won't ruin it too much for those who haven't seen it but it definitely tugs at the heart!
It reminded me of an experience that I had at the gym the other day. I was waiting for my last weight machine - before going home. Usually, I just find something else to do while I'm waiting but since this was the last one of the day (and I had already been there for an hour and a half) I decided a break wouldn't hurt. I was also drawn to the couple using the machine I was waiting for. I've seen them there before and they've always intrigued me - but I've never had an excuse to watch them.
They are probably close to 80 years old. She was in a wheel chair and he had to hold her while she got out of the wheelchair and onto the seat of the machine. She was obviously in pain, and every movement took every ounce of strength. I tried not to stare - but it was so amazing. He brushed back her hair and gave little words of encouragement. He counted every repetition with her and they giggled with each little grunt that she gave. He pulled out an old worn notebook and wrote something down, then smiled at her and touched her cheek. He waited while she rested for a minute and then gently helped her out again and down the line to the next machine. They smiled at me and thanked me for waiting, I said it was my pleasure. After I was done my set the man leaned over form the next machine and said 'you must be strong to do that much' and I winked and said 'at the rate she's going - she'll be there in no time' ...then I reached down and touched her knee and said 'you deserve a good break after this!'
It was such a simple but beautiful encounter, I am still intrigued by them. I wonder what happened to her - or if it's simply old age. I wonder how long he's been bringing her and helping her build her strength. Mostly, I am just in awe of their connection and love -- and the giggles they shared together through the pain.
I'm just an old romantic....
xo J
It reminded me of an experience that I had at the gym the other day. I was waiting for my last weight machine - before going home. Usually, I just find something else to do while I'm waiting but since this was the last one of the day (and I had already been there for an hour and a half) I decided a break wouldn't hurt. I was also drawn to the couple using the machine I was waiting for. I've seen them there before and they've always intrigued me - but I've never had an excuse to watch them.
They are probably close to 80 years old. She was in a wheel chair and he had to hold her while she got out of the wheelchair and onto the seat of the machine. She was obviously in pain, and every movement took every ounce of strength. I tried not to stare - but it was so amazing. He brushed back her hair and gave little words of encouragement. He counted every repetition with her and they giggled with each little grunt that she gave. He pulled out an old worn notebook and wrote something down, then smiled at her and touched her cheek. He waited while she rested for a minute and then gently helped her out again and down the line to the next machine. They smiled at me and thanked me for waiting, I said it was my pleasure. After I was done my set the man leaned over form the next machine and said 'you must be strong to do that much' and I winked and said 'at the rate she's going - she'll be there in no time' ...then I reached down and touched her knee and said 'you deserve a good break after this!'
It was such a simple but beautiful encounter, I am still intrigued by them. I wonder what happened to her - or if it's simply old age. I wonder how long he's been bringing her and helping her build her strength. Mostly, I am just in awe of their connection and love -- and the giggles they shared together through the pain.
I'm just an old romantic....
xo J
Friday, February 18
Little vs.Chrysler
The Arbitration hearing with Chrysler was today...fun stuff :)
To update you a little;
We bought a new 2004 Chrysler SX2.0 (basically a Neon Sport) in October and found that it had a few too many problems for our liking. It was running and starting rough, idling at a very low rpm speed, and basically not acting like a new car should! Since it's under a 3 year bumper to bumper warranty we continued to bring it into the dealership until basically they had done everything that they were willing to do and the problems were still there. So we decided to bring it to CAMVAP - which is a government organization that mediates between us and Chrsyler to find a solution to the problem.
To update you a little;
We bought a new 2004 Chrysler SX2.0 (basically a Neon Sport) in October and found that it had a few too many problems for our liking. It was running and starting rough, idling at a very low rpm speed, and basically not acting like a new car should! Since it's under a 3 year bumper to bumper warranty we continued to bring it into the dealership until basically they had done everything that they were willing to do and the problems were still there. So we decided to bring it to CAMVAP - which is a government organization that mediates between us and Chrsyler to find a solution to the problem.
We had the Arbitration hearing today with Chrysler and CAMVAP. We scheduled it today for 1 so that Tim would be in school but he was sick today and had to come with us - poor little guy. (He did really great though, sat so quietly and read some books, wrote me a love note and listened intently to the hearing...I bribed him with Ice Cream :)
The hearing went really well, we think. Chrysler was trying to say that the problem was self inflicted because in one of the videos Garnet had started and stopped the vehicle a few times - and they said that he was causing the problem. We both think it helped to have me there because I was able to say that the problems were happening to me as well and I have never started and stopped the vehicle. Also we showed them times when it's happened at the first start up of the car. Basically, we are up against a giant but the mediator seemed very fair and even the man from Chrysler agreed with us that the dealership had not done everything in it's power to solve the problems.
We had originally wanted a buy back of the vehicle but over the last little while we've seen that this would cost us more in time, effort and money than we would like to take the chance of. So it seemed like they were leaning towards ordering Chrysler to fix the problem - which we would be very happy with. Unfortunately, we'll have to wait a few more weeks to find that out!
Sunday, February 13
The big 2-5!!!!
Garnet worked all weekend so my special Birthday Buddy and me made the best of my day!! Tim made me a VERY special birthday card and sounded out "Happy Birthday" all by himself!! He said he wanted to take me out to Pizza Hut for my birthday...but I wasn't really feeling like piggin' out on pizza. So we made Cheese Cappelletti and Brownies and then went for a big shopping spree :) It was an excellent birthday weekend!
Here are a few special pics from our weekend together....more on the album! (including him singing happy birthday to me)
Birthday Card
Big Smiles!! This was (the model) Tim's idea to lay like this for the picture - he wanted to lay on the couch -- but we both didn't fit.... We had some good laughs trying though and decided on the floor (for mommy's big butt - he said :)
silly
making brownies!!!
Here are a few special pics from our weekend together....more on the album! (including him singing happy birthday to me)
Birthday Card
Big Smiles!! This was (the model) Tim's idea to lay like this for the picture - he wanted to lay on the couch -- but we both didn't fit.... We had some good laughs trying though and decided on the floor (for mommy's big butt - he said :)
silly
making brownies!!!
Saturday, February 12
Insane Love?
Valentine's Day comes and everyone starts thinking about love. I'm in a blabbing mood today so bear with me on this one...but I had a few revelations to share.
I read a parenting article about the love we have for our children that described parenting as the 'only form of insanity still accepted by society'. I got a good laugh and if you're a parent you know exactly why that's so funny and true! What sane person would choose to love someone and devote their life to taking care of someone before they even meet them? Who would give up sleep, money, clean clothes, showers and time alone to love someone that can't even say their name? And is there any sanity to be found in going through a long, tiring nine months and excruciating pain just to hear someone cry!?
And yet.... it's the most rewarding and fulfilling kind of love there is.
How interesting, when you start to think about how we love other people in our lives. It's sad, but the other kind of loves can be a lot more selfish. We want to feel loved - but have such a hard time reciprocating it. We go into relationships wondering what we can take from them - instead of give to them. And we wonder why we are so unfulfilled and feel unloved....with little thought as to how the other one is feeling.
Maybe it's because society frowns on this selfless kind of love. There is so much emphasis on how we should be independant and free...not needing anyone. And so we feel we need to prove our independance. We are so afraid to really let it all go and be in love. To really need them and be with them. In this society self-preservation seems to be put above all else and the words 'I love you' become associated with weakness.
One of my biggest downfalls is that the people I love the most - I treat the worst at times. I take out other stresses in life on the people closest to me. It's seems to be a lot easier to yell at my husband than my boss! I have a temper to be reckoned with and my tongue gets a life of it's own...before I know it I've said more than I wanted to, half of which I don't even mean. So many people do this...even though it hurts.
This same parenting article that I read talks about how tantrums (from children) are really a sign of love and trust. In other words, your child couldn't be so disappointed or angry unless he trusted you deeply in the first place. And his tantrums are a way of testing the boundaries and his parents love for him. It's almost as if he's seeing how far he can go -- and see if mommy is still there! I guess this could be related back to my temper blow ups too. I only feel confortable enough around the people I love and trust to really blow up. I would never take out my bad day on a stranger. I actually tend to come across as a very patient person most of the time! And it's funny because a child's tantrums are usually based on their misconceptions - also true for us. The child throws a fit because they want that cookie...but Mommy knows that it's not healthy to have the cookie before dinner. The child however thinks this is the worst possible thing that could ever happen. Often we are most angry when we misconceive others motives as well.
But the difference between a meltdown between a mother and child versus a meltdown between 2 adults is that there is no memory of the scene minutes after it's happenedin the mind of the mother...literally. Scientists have studied Mother's brains when looking at a picture of their child and found that the part of the brain that shows pleasure and happiness 'lit up like a slot machine'. But at the very same time the part that judges and criticizes pratically shut down! In her eyes this child can literally do no wrong. Can you imagine how great our lives would be if we could forgive people like this? With no ability to remember the wrongdoings or hurt...just the good stuff!
Despite my temper - I can also be a very loving and giving person, and I find the days that give of myself and my time to my husband, friends or Tim are the days that I feel most fulfilled, and happy. I feel like even though I have barely thought of my needs that day - strangely, all my needs have been met. If I could learn to love everyone as unselfishly as love is supposed to be....it would be amazing. Like this 'insane' love I have for Tim; I still get mad at things he does - but within seconds my anger melts and he is the most amazing person in the world. And no matter how mad I am there isn't a second in my life that I wouldn't give up for him. He can give me a gift as simple as a drawing of a happy face and I am on the verge of tears at his thoughtfulness. Parenting is so hard - and there are days that we feel we could quit...but yet we wake up the next morning fresh faced and with no memory of the day before. We sacrifice all of our wants and needs to make sure that this little one is warm and safe and loved and happy; without a single thought to what we are 'giving up'. In the end we find out that all those things we thought were so important in our lives before -- really aren't important.
So this 'only accepted form of insanity' can really teach us a lot about truly loving someone. I know it has taught me so much everyday of my life. And just maybe this kind of love isn't so insane after all... Maybe true forgiveness is a matter of truly forgiving and forgetting... Maybe Valentine's Day wouldn't be such a huge holiday and money maker if we treated our loved ones like they deserve everyday... Maybe we'd all be a lot happier if we could just let our important people in our lives know just how important and loved they are...all the time.
There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life -- happiness, freedom, and peace of mind -- are always attained by giving them to someone else. ~Peyton Conway March
{And I think I would like to add a fourth to this list; LOVE...}
After all that rambling and in the Valentine's spirit....big hugs to everyone that is special in my life. And if I don't tell you often enough; I love you!
xo J
I read a parenting article about the love we have for our children that described parenting as the 'only form of insanity still accepted by society'. I got a good laugh and if you're a parent you know exactly why that's so funny and true! What sane person would choose to love someone and devote their life to taking care of someone before they even meet them? Who would give up sleep, money, clean clothes, showers and time alone to love someone that can't even say their name? And is there any sanity to be found in going through a long, tiring nine months and excruciating pain just to hear someone cry!?
And yet.... it's the most rewarding and fulfilling kind of love there is.
How interesting, when you start to think about how we love other people in our lives. It's sad, but the other kind of loves can be a lot more selfish. We want to feel loved - but have such a hard time reciprocating it. We go into relationships wondering what we can take from them - instead of give to them. And we wonder why we are so unfulfilled and feel unloved....with little thought as to how the other one is feeling.
Maybe it's because society frowns on this selfless kind of love. There is so much emphasis on how we should be independant and free...not needing anyone. And so we feel we need to prove our independance. We are so afraid to really let it all go and be in love. To really need them and be with them. In this society self-preservation seems to be put above all else and the words 'I love you' become associated with weakness.
One of my biggest downfalls is that the people I love the most - I treat the worst at times. I take out other stresses in life on the people closest to me. It's seems to be a lot easier to yell at my husband than my boss! I have a temper to be reckoned with and my tongue gets a life of it's own...before I know it I've said more than I wanted to, half of which I don't even mean. So many people do this...even though it hurts.
This same parenting article that I read talks about how tantrums (from children) are really a sign of love and trust. In other words, your child couldn't be so disappointed or angry unless he trusted you deeply in the first place. And his tantrums are a way of testing the boundaries and his parents love for him. It's almost as if he's seeing how far he can go -- and see if mommy is still there! I guess this could be related back to my temper blow ups too. I only feel confortable enough around the people I love and trust to really blow up. I would never take out my bad day on a stranger. I actually tend to come across as a very patient person most of the time! And it's funny because a child's tantrums are usually based on their misconceptions - also true for us. The child throws a fit because they want that cookie...but Mommy knows that it's not healthy to have the cookie before dinner. The child however thinks this is the worst possible thing that could ever happen. Often we are most angry when we misconceive others motives as well.
But the difference between a meltdown between a mother and child versus a meltdown between 2 adults is that there is no memory of the scene minutes after it's happenedin the mind of the mother...literally. Scientists have studied Mother's brains when looking at a picture of their child and found that the part of the brain that shows pleasure and happiness 'lit up like a slot machine'. But at the very same time the part that judges and criticizes pratically shut down! In her eyes this child can literally do no wrong. Can you imagine how great our lives would be if we could forgive people like this? With no ability to remember the wrongdoings or hurt...just the good stuff!
Despite my temper - I can also be a very loving and giving person, and I find the days that give of myself and my time to my husband, friends or Tim are the days that I feel most fulfilled, and happy. I feel like even though I have barely thought of my needs that day - strangely, all my needs have been met. If I could learn to love everyone as unselfishly as love is supposed to be....it would be amazing. Like this 'insane' love I have for Tim; I still get mad at things he does - but within seconds my anger melts and he is the most amazing person in the world. And no matter how mad I am there isn't a second in my life that I wouldn't give up for him. He can give me a gift as simple as a drawing of a happy face and I am on the verge of tears at his thoughtfulness. Parenting is so hard - and there are days that we feel we could quit...but yet we wake up the next morning fresh faced and with no memory of the day before. We sacrifice all of our wants and needs to make sure that this little one is warm and safe and loved and happy; without a single thought to what we are 'giving up'. In the end we find out that all those things we thought were so important in our lives before -- really aren't important.
So this 'only accepted form of insanity' can really teach us a lot about truly loving someone. I know it has taught me so much everyday of my life. And just maybe this kind of love isn't so insane after all... Maybe true forgiveness is a matter of truly forgiving and forgetting... Maybe Valentine's Day wouldn't be such a huge holiday and money maker if we treated our loved ones like they deserve everyday... Maybe we'd all be a lot happier if we could just let our important people in our lives know just how important and loved they are...all the time.
There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life -- happiness, freedom, and peace of mind -- are always attained by giving them to someone else. ~Peyton Conway March
{And I think I would like to add a fourth to this list; LOVE...}
After all that rambling and in the Valentine's spirit....big hugs to everyone that is special in my life. And if I don't tell you often enough; I love you!
xo J
Friday, February 11
I'm a Proud Mama :)
Tim got his report card yesterday....he's so smart! I mean, of course every parent thinks that their kid is the next Einstein -- but I can brag for a minute :)
He's doing very well in all the areas, the teacher is absolutely amazing and I know this has helped him a great deal. It's exciting to hear all of the things he's learning and soaking in! He's just moved up a level in reading because he's sounding out letters and words...already!
We are very proud because he is very smart, but it's so good to hear all the positive things the teacher has to say about his character and spirit!
She says; "Tim is very creative and enthusiastic, expressing himself in unique ways..." and "His lively nature and interesting comments and questions bring so many smiles to the whole class"
She also mentions how he offers creative ideas to help invent new dances to perform as a class....I asked him to show us last night but he was so embarrassed! I'll be sure to get it on video when he decides to share it with us....just as long as he doesn't dance like his father :)
Aawwww, it's good to be a Mommy!!
xo J
He's doing very well in all the areas, the teacher is absolutely amazing and I know this has helped him a great deal. It's exciting to hear all of the things he's learning and soaking in! He's just moved up a level in reading because he's sounding out letters and words...already!
We are very proud because he is very smart, but it's so good to hear all the positive things the teacher has to say about his character and spirit!
She says; "Tim is very creative and enthusiastic, expressing himself in unique ways..." and "His lively nature and interesting comments and questions bring so many smiles to the whole class"
She also mentions how he offers creative ideas to help invent new dances to perform as a class....I asked him to show us last night but he was so embarrassed! I'll be sure to get it on video when he decides to share it with us....just as long as he doesn't dance like his father :)
Aawwww, it's good to be a Mommy!!
xo J
Wednesday, February 9
Shifty work...
Garnet and I have never been big on schedules and routine...we're kinda known for our sponteneity and spur of the moment decisions. But I'm starting to realize that shift work is not the spur of the moment kind of lifestyle that we really like. For lack of a better adjective; it just plain sucks. For the first few years of our marriage Garnet was in school all week and worked a weekend job. That was definitely hard on us - but atleast there was some sort of schedule and we knew the few minutes per day that we'd have together. And...I could count on him being there every night.
He's been full time at the Bridge now for just over a year and I'm noticing how hard shift work really is - on the whole family! Studies have shown that it can take up to 10 years off your life, serious health problems are twice as common in shift workers and divorce rates are skyrocketing. I can completely see how all of this stuff is just contributed to shift work. Social lives take a lot of work -- my friend's husband is a nurse (shift as well) and the last time the 4 of us hung out was in the summer! Because they are always on different schedules and then the time that you do have together you want to spend as a family - not always booking it full!
It's especially hard on Garnet and I because we have always gone to bed at the same time. If both of us are home - we've never done the 'one stays up to watch tv while the other one crashes'. I know it sounds pathetic but it's worked for us, and that's always been our time to talk and catch up on the day. So when he's sleeping during the day - and I'm sleeping at night it's hard to find that time together.
So last night I did something really funny - I put Tim to bed at 7 and was tucking Garnet in for his nap before work at midnight and I decided to go to bed as well. I had dishes and laundry to do and a million other things that I could have done butI decided to go to bed....at 7 pm!! I guess I needed it because I got up to send Garnet off at 11 and went back to bed until 7 this morning!! I feel very rested this morning!!
I may not have found the trick to making this shift work thing work -- but it felt nice to not think about my schedule while Garnet's trying to live a different one!! I know I'll survive the shift work thing - it definitely has it's perks as well! Like this week he's going back on 12 hour shifts so he's on for 2 days off for 3 days, and vice-versa - which is really nice! And it pays off in the paychecks too so I can't complain about too much!
And I guess I'll just have to keep finding little ways to make it easier....like going to bed at 7!
xo J
He's been full time at the Bridge now for just over a year and I'm noticing how hard shift work really is - on the whole family! Studies have shown that it can take up to 10 years off your life, serious health problems are twice as common in shift workers and divorce rates are skyrocketing. I can completely see how all of this stuff is just contributed to shift work. Social lives take a lot of work -- my friend's husband is a nurse (shift as well) and the last time the 4 of us hung out was in the summer! Because they are always on different schedules and then the time that you do have together you want to spend as a family - not always booking it full!
It's especially hard on Garnet and I because we have always gone to bed at the same time. If both of us are home - we've never done the 'one stays up to watch tv while the other one crashes'. I know it sounds pathetic but it's worked for us, and that's always been our time to talk and catch up on the day. So when he's sleeping during the day - and I'm sleeping at night it's hard to find that time together.
So last night I did something really funny - I put Tim to bed at 7 and was tucking Garnet in for his nap before work at midnight and I decided to go to bed as well. I had dishes and laundry to do and a million other things that I could have done butI decided to go to bed....at 7 pm!! I guess I needed it because I got up to send Garnet off at 11 and went back to bed until 7 this morning!! I feel very rested this morning!!
I may not have found the trick to making this shift work thing work -- but it felt nice to not think about my schedule while Garnet's trying to live a different one!! I know I'll survive the shift work thing - it definitely has it's perks as well! Like this week he's going back on 12 hour shifts so he's on for 2 days off for 3 days, and vice-versa - which is really nice! And it pays off in the paychecks too so I can't complain about too much!
And I guess I'll just have to keep finding little ways to make it easier....like going to bed at 7!
xo J
A Fluish Dilemma
I have been always been avidly against the flu shot. In the years past I have had people tell me to get it just because I have asthma and a risk for Flu compications. I have never even considered getting it - arguing that there has not been enough research or time to know if it's actually benificial. But I never really researched it myself - I was just going on the gut instinct that I wasn't going to put something into my body that could potentially harm me, more than what it was suppposed to protect me from.
This year however, my weak back bone - accompanied with last year's harsh memory of Garnet, Tim and I in bed for two weeks - caved miserably. I got the flu shot and I dragged my son in with me as well. I figured whatever complications or whatever I was doing to my body must be better then the flu. Boy, was I ever wrong. I find it no mere coincidence that within weeks of receiving the flu shot Tim suddenly developed a rash and an allergy to advil (which he had taken before) and still has the red, dry itchy skin from his rash. I have been sick 4 times since I got the flu shot, so it might not be called 'the flu' but alteast last year I was only sick once!
So the other night my mom told me about how they are forcing health care workers to receive the flu shot or they can't come to work in the case of a flu outbreak. How weird. Now, maybe it's just me but last time I checked we did live in a free country and it was our decision what to put in our own bodies! No one tells a restaurant worker that they must like all the food on the menu or they are not able to work there! I can understand the risk of not having the flu shot - if you're working around a bunch of flu patients...and the uneducated me might have said 'sure, it makes sense for nurses to have the flu shot' but then I read up on the flu shot. Here are a few exerpts of the scary things I read;
- only 10-15% of the flu like illnesses that people experience are actually caused by the flu virus that they are vaccinated against.
- only 1 in 4 people vaccinated are actually protected (doesn't work in everyone)
- the results are even lower than 1 in 4 in the elderly (highest risk age group for flu complications)
Just those numbers alone make me think is all the time and money put into these flu vaccinations really worth it? Then the more I read the worse I felt;
- Flu vaccines contain 'thimerosal' as a perservative which contains mercury. Which is why they've linked long term flu shots to high cases of Alzeimer's! (ie; the more flu shots you have over the years the higher chance you have of developing Alzeimer's)
- To find the vaccination for the next year Scientists kill migrating ducks in Asia, culture the viruses and put those in next year's vaccine. (because they have seen an association between bird and pig viruses and the following year's human flu epidemics.) Perhaps this desperate guesswork is responsible for so many years when the flu vaccines viruses had nothing in common with circulating viruses.
I understand that any site I read is going to be one sided. The sites against the flu shot have some horrible things to say and the sites in favour have some great things to say. But the fact that my gut instinct before was against it, I found enough information to back me up on mydecision - I am never going to let myself be swayed again.
My conclusion is this;
I feel that the flu shot is a form of experiment, grounded in society's fear of dying. And since we no longer test on animals - they have taken to testing on humans. (Although they are so good in reassuring us that this is not what they are doing.)
We have all had some horrible flu experiences, no one enjoys it, and no one wants to get it again. But our bodies are strong and need to experience germs and sickness in order to build the immune system. There are over 200 different (known) cold viruses that we may experience in our lives. We can never have the same one twice but think about it -- if we only get 2 colds per year....we 'd be a hundred before we experience them all! Parents that come into the Y are always worried saying 'my baby is sick again!' but I always reassure them that it's part of the body's way of building up antibodies. It's not fun - but they need to experience it.
I think that there is a reason that Cancer, ADD, Autism, Allergies, Diabetes, Asthma and many other horrible diseases are on the rise in our society in our children. We are so worried about them getting, meningitis, chicken pox, colds and the flu - no one is stopping to ask why all these others are ravaging our children! I think that our diet and lifestyle do not allow children to build up the antibodies that they need to have a strong immune system! I am no scientist - and I wouldn't even know where to begin to prove my point but I do believe that in years from now people will be shaking their heads at us and calling us stupid for trying to find a vaccine for every little thing...especially the FLU!
The chicken pox vaccine (which I will never give to Tim) is wiping out the wild virus - but they don't know how long it immunizes a person against the virus! Which means that in years to come we will have a whole lot of adults with Shingles - because they never experienced Chicken Pox as a child. Shingles has many more serious complications than Chicken Pox which means that right now as I write this Scientists are scrambling trying to find a 'shingles vaccine'. Where does it end??? And worst of all as they discover new and different vaccines and medications - there is less and less thought of long term effect/complications.
A perfect example is the COX-2 Inhibitors (Vioxx and Celebrex) which are pain medications taken for Arthritis pain. After these medications were approved in Canada and the US they found that 'oops, they cause patients to have severe heart attacks'....where does it end?? I wonder how much this medication was actually tested before they decided to test on humans???
So, as this conclusion is my opinion, I am not looking for anybody to get offended. I realize that everyone has different opinions and I am more than open to hear others -- I was very angry at myself for giving in to people's opinions before researching it thoroughly on my own.
My warning is; whatever your opinion - just make sure you are grounded, firm and educated in your opinion!!
xo J
PS: some of my research involved;
VRAN website http://64.41.99.118/vran/vaccines/flu/flu_facts.htm
Dr. Mercola; http://www.mercola.com/2003/dec/13/flu_vaccine.htm
La Leva; http://www.laleva.org/eng/
NNii; http://www.immunizationinfo.org/influenza_detail.cfv?id=80
This year however, my weak back bone - accompanied with last year's harsh memory of Garnet, Tim and I in bed for two weeks - caved miserably. I got the flu shot and I dragged my son in with me as well. I figured whatever complications or whatever I was doing to my body must be better then the flu. Boy, was I ever wrong. I find it no mere coincidence that within weeks of receiving the flu shot Tim suddenly developed a rash and an allergy to advil (which he had taken before) and still has the red, dry itchy skin from his rash. I have been sick 4 times since I got the flu shot, so it might not be called 'the flu' but alteast last year I was only sick once!
So the other night my mom told me about how they are forcing health care workers to receive the flu shot or they can't come to work in the case of a flu outbreak. How weird. Now, maybe it's just me but last time I checked we did live in a free country and it was our decision what to put in our own bodies! No one tells a restaurant worker that they must like all the food on the menu or they are not able to work there! I can understand the risk of not having the flu shot - if you're working around a bunch of flu patients...and the uneducated me might have said 'sure, it makes sense for nurses to have the flu shot' but then I read up on the flu shot. Here are a few exerpts of the scary things I read;
- only 10-15% of the flu like illnesses that people experience are actually caused by the flu virus that they are vaccinated against.
- only 1 in 4 people vaccinated are actually protected (doesn't work in everyone)
- the results are even lower than 1 in 4 in the elderly (highest risk age group for flu complications)
Just those numbers alone make me think is all the time and money put into these flu vaccinations really worth it? Then the more I read the worse I felt;
- Flu vaccines contain 'thimerosal' as a perservative which contains mercury. Which is why they've linked long term flu shots to high cases of Alzeimer's! (ie; the more flu shots you have over the years the higher chance you have of developing Alzeimer's)
- To find the vaccination for the next year Scientists kill migrating ducks in Asia, culture the viruses and put those in next year's vaccine. (because they have seen an association between bird and pig viruses and the following year's human flu epidemics.) Perhaps this desperate guesswork is responsible for so many years when the flu vaccines viruses had nothing in common with circulating viruses.
I understand that any site I read is going to be one sided. The sites against the flu shot have some horrible things to say and the sites in favour have some great things to say. But the fact that my gut instinct before was against it, I found enough information to back me up on mydecision - I am never going to let myself be swayed again.
My conclusion is this;
I feel that the flu shot is a form of experiment, grounded in society's fear of dying. And since we no longer test on animals - they have taken to testing on humans. (Although they are so good in reassuring us that this is not what they are doing.)
We have all had some horrible flu experiences, no one enjoys it, and no one wants to get it again. But our bodies are strong and need to experience germs and sickness in order to build the immune system. There are over 200 different (known) cold viruses that we may experience in our lives. We can never have the same one twice but think about it -- if we only get 2 colds per year....we 'd be a hundred before we experience them all! Parents that come into the Y are always worried saying 'my baby is sick again!' but I always reassure them that it's part of the body's way of building up antibodies. It's not fun - but they need to experience it.
I think that there is a reason that Cancer, ADD, Autism, Allergies, Diabetes, Asthma and many other horrible diseases are on the rise in our society in our children. We are so worried about them getting, meningitis, chicken pox, colds and the flu - no one is stopping to ask why all these others are ravaging our children! I think that our diet and lifestyle do not allow children to build up the antibodies that they need to have a strong immune system! I am no scientist - and I wouldn't even know where to begin to prove my point but I do believe that in years from now people will be shaking their heads at us and calling us stupid for trying to find a vaccine for every little thing...especially the FLU!
The chicken pox vaccine (which I will never give to Tim) is wiping out the wild virus - but they don't know how long it immunizes a person against the virus! Which means that in years to come we will have a whole lot of adults with Shingles - because they never experienced Chicken Pox as a child. Shingles has many more serious complications than Chicken Pox which means that right now as I write this Scientists are scrambling trying to find a 'shingles vaccine'. Where does it end??? And worst of all as they discover new and different vaccines and medications - there is less and less thought of long term effect/complications.
A perfect example is the COX-2 Inhibitors (Vioxx and Celebrex) which are pain medications taken for Arthritis pain. After these medications were approved in Canada and the US they found that 'oops, they cause patients to have severe heart attacks'....where does it end?? I wonder how much this medication was actually tested before they decided to test on humans???
So, as this conclusion is my opinion, I am not looking for anybody to get offended. I realize that everyone has different opinions and I am more than open to hear others -- I was very angry at myself for giving in to people's opinions before researching it thoroughly on my own.
My warning is; whatever your opinion - just make sure you are grounded, firm and educated in your opinion!!
xo J
PS: some of my research involved;
VRAN website http://64.41.99.118/vran/vaccines/flu/flu_facts.htm
Dr. Mercola; http://www.mercola.com/2003/dec/13/flu_vaccine.htm
La Leva; http://www.laleva.org/eng/
NNii; http://www.immunizationinfo.org/influenza_detail.cfv?id=80
Sunday, February 6
A Day in Windsor
We went to see my Grandma who was visiting Jack and JoAnne in Windsor. We took Hillary and Grandma out for supper and had a really nice time. I love my Grandma :) I have put more pictures up on imageevent, but these were a few cute ones.
Having a special walk with Great Grandma
So cool!
Jessi and Grandma
Tim and Uncle Giacomo and Aunt JoAnne
Having a special walk with Great Grandma
So cool!
Jessi and Grandma
Tim and Uncle Giacomo and Aunt JoAnne
Saturday, February 5
Congrats!
My Cousin Nick and his Fiance Lanna are getting married this summer - A huge Congratulations guys!
It's going to be a great summer. My cousin Bobbi and her baby (due in April) will be coming from Calgary! So we are hoping to be up in the Great White North for the better part of August! Can't wait!! I'll put a picture of Bobbi and her belly up as soon as she'll send me one!! (hint, hint Bobbi!)
Nick and Lanna
It's going to be a great summer. My cousin Bobbi and her baby (due in April) will be coming from Calgary! So we are hoping to be up in the Great White North for the better part of August! Can't wait!! I'll put a picture of Bobbi and her belly up as soon as she'll send me one!! (hint, hint Bobbi!)
Nick and Lanna
Friday, February 4
A New, Tiny Angel
As many of you know we are watching our friends little girl go through the fight of her life right now. Baby Julia is the daughter of our friends Mike and Charlene. We spent Canada Day with them last year - watching fireworks from their boat with a healthy, happy little girl and a month later she was diagnosed with Acute Leukemia. It's a very sad story and sometimes it's unbearable to think about - especially as parents. Empathizing and trying to understand what it would feel like to watch our baby fight such a vicious monster - and knowing that we were unable to help at all.
Julia is still fighting her fight as strong as a little one year old can. But they got some sad news when another little girl - who was the inspiration to the Krause Family - has lost her fight. Little Hannah was only three and passed away yesterday. Her parents seem like amazing people when you read what they were able to write. Wow, I am amazed at their strength, and courage. Please read; http://www2.caringbridge.org/canada/hannah/ and continue to keep Julia, and her family in your thoughts and prayers as I'm sure this will be an extremely hard time for them.
Julia is still fighting her fight as strong as a little one year old can. But they got some sad news when another little girl - who was the inspiration to the Krause Family - has lost her fight. Little Hannah was only three and passed away yesterday. Her parents seem like amazing people when you read what they were able to write. Wow, I am amazed at their strength, and courage. Please read; http://www2.caringbridge.org/canada/hannah/ and continue to keep Julia, and her family in your thoughts and prayers as I'm sure this will be an extremely hard time for them.
Wednesday, February 2
aarrrrrrrrggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have mentioned our new home renovation projects earlier in the blog. It's fun and exciting to make changes and make it 'our home'. However, the kitchen job is turning into a test of my sanity, patience and my marriage. Let me try to explain as best I can;
First of all, we decided when we put an offer in on the house that we would change the closet in the hall and make room in our kitchen for the fridge. We knew that this would be our first project, but I didn't realize how soon Garnet was ready to start. He took a hammer and a saw to the wall the first day we moved in!! (first picture) We didn't even have posession yet! For those who know Garnet - it's no surprise. I wasn't even surprised, I was barely even upset, just sort of shaking my head.
Then we got someone in to 'clean up' Garnet's first mess and do a nice job. This contractor turned out to be a pain in the ...everything! He would show up hours late - or not at all. And he was the slowest worker I've ever seen. One day he was supposed to be there at 1 and showed up at 7 pm and wanted to work! I politely said 'no, I don't think so thank you'. I was sick for a week and he stayed til 10 pm 3 nights in a row while I was coughing and in desperate need of my bed. Needless to say he was not a joy to have around. The job that was supposed to be done before Christmas was finally over in the middle of January.
Then this wonderful contractor - who quoted us 4 days work and $700 for the job - showed up with a bill for almost $1300. Over a grand in just labour!! (labour?!?! yeah, cause he worked so hard!) So I was really polite again, my temper was controlled quite easily on this one (I'm oozing with sarcasm here)
The worst part of this whole ordeal is that a week after all of this is finally over with and I can drink my coffee without drywall chunks in it - my husband has another idea. He saw someone else's unit who ripped the whole wall out between the kitchen and the hallway...and he's set on doing that here. I'm all for the openness, and more space - I love the idea - except for one LITTLE thing....... We just went through that whole nightmare and all that money to have the wall built!!!!!!! I love my husband more than anything else in the world, he keeps my life interesting and exciting....but I don't get this one!
One of Garnet's professor's from Custom's Training in Rigaud, Quebec met me at the Graduation - after living with and teaching him for 2 months. She grabbed my hand and kissed me and said; "There is a special place in heaven for you dear!!"
I am going to muster up all the patience I have in my body and love him with every ounce of love in me....and then after all this kitchen stuff is over I'm going on a nice long trip!!!!!!
xo J
the first hole...
the new closet
the finished job (before paint)
First of all, we decided when we put an offer in on the house that we would change the closet in the hall and make room in our kitchen for the fridge. We knew that this would be our first project, but I didn't realize how soon Garnet was ready to start. He took a hammer and a saw to the wall the first day we moved in!! (first picture) We didn't even have posession yet! For those who know Garnet - it's no surprise. I wasn't even surprised, I was barely even upset, just sort of shaking my head.
Then we got someone in to 'clean up' Garnet's first mess and do a nice job. This contractor turned out to be a pain in the ...everything! He would show up hours late - or not at all. And he was the slowest worker I've ever seen. One day he was supposed to be there at 1 and showed up at 7 pm and wanted to work! I politely said 'no, I don't think so thank you'. I was sick for a week and he stayed til 10 pm 3 nights in a row while I was coughing and in desperate need of my bed. Needless to say he was not a joy to have around. The job that was supposed to be done before Christmas was finally over in the middle of January.
Then this wonderful contractor - who quoted us 4 days work and $700 for the job - showed up with a bill for almost $1300. Over a grand in just labour!! (labour?!?! yeah, cause he worked so hard!) So I was really polite again, my temper was controlled quite easily on this one (I'm oozing with sarcasm here)
The worst part of this whole ordeal is that a week after all of this is finally over with and I can drink my coffee without drywall chunks in it - my husband has another idea. He saw someone else's unit who ripped the whole wall out between the kitchen and the hallway...and he's set on doing that here. I'm all for the openness, and more space - I love the idea - except for one LITTLE thing....... We just went through that whole nightmare and all that money to have the wall built!!!!!!! I love my husband more than anything else in the world, he keeps my life interesting and exciting....but I don't get this one!
One of Garnet's professor's from Custom's Training in Rigaud, Quebec met me at the Graduation - after living with and teaching him for 2 months. She grabbed my hand and kissed me and said; "There is a special place in heaven for you dear!!"
I am going to muster up all the patience I have in my body and love him with every ounce of love in me....and then after all this kitchen stuff is over I'm going on a nice long trip!!!!!!
xo J
the first hole...
the new closet
the finished job (before paint)
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